Tag Archive: relationships


Act Better

Post written by Dharini Woollcombe

How to Act Better:

  1. Know that you are utterly UNIQUE
  2. Remember that we are all in this TOGETHER
  3. Learn to keep LEARNING

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I came across a bright pink sticky note marking a passage from an article I had read a few months ago. I believe it is well worth sharing.  Although screenwriter J. Michael Straczynski is referring to his experience in the world of writing, what he says is completely translatable in to the world of acting:

“The problem is that often writers think we’re all in competition with each other, which can lead them to be awkward when someone else does well, but I’ve never believed that. We each represent a unique point of view; we each stand on a piece of ground occupied by no one else in the world. No one else can tell a “fill in the name” story like “fill in the name” can. But not everyone perceives that, and that is unfortunate.

Then there are some people who, the more they accomplish, the louder they get. I was that way at the start, desperate to convince people that I had done what it takes. In later years, particularly the aftermath of Changeling, I’ve gotten quieter and calmer, more at rest in how I relate to people. I put all that misspent energy into challenging myself creatively, looking for new techniques and experimenting in new forms.

Every day I discover something new about storytelling or acquire a new tool for the toolbox. And that’s really the key metaphor: When you start out as a writer, at most you have a screwdriver and a rusty pair of pliers in your toolbox, and there are only so many things you can build with them, and only to a certain minimal level of quality. If you pay attention, if you work at your craft, you begin to acquire more tools that allow you to make a more diverse range of things with greater finesse and skill.

But those tools don’t just come to you unbidden: You have to listen and look for them and be open to new tools even if they scare you.

…When someone hires you to write a script, they are paying you a compliment of unimaginable proportion. They are paying you to make black marks on a piece of paper. They’re saying, “Here’s a bucket of money…tell us a story.” If you can find something more amazing than that, let me know….”

- Creative Screenwriting (November 2009, Vol.16, No. 6)

Mr. Straczynski says it like it is.

We are all unique, and no journey is ever the same. So why try to emulate some one else’s path and why resent them for the choices they make? Focus on your own path, discover it, take chances, and take leaps of faith. Get involved in your own journey.

We are all in it together. So why not find, create, and promote community. We actors spend a lot of time off on our own when not working on projects. So why not get out there, spend time with your colleagues and friends. Learn from each other, support each other. Go get basket of fries and shoot the breeze.

When someone experiences accomplishments and success, they should be able to share these things, not worry about being greeted with resentment, and envy.

But resentment and envy come from dissatisfaction in one’s own life. What can you do about that?

Be proactive in your own life and (yes, you’ve heard me say this before) create the life you want.

Make choices and take action.

Find your way to process, and learning, and growth.

This will keep you active, engaged, stimulated, and excited about things in your life…as opposed to sitting around feeling sorry for yourself, jealous about your friend, and wasting your life away in negativity…I mean really, who wants to do that?

Not you?

Ok!

Then do something about it – because the more Action you take in your Life, the more Life you bring to your Acting.

Post written by Dharini Woollcombe.

How to be Inspired by Frustrating People:

  1. Identify a person who bugs you and rubs you the wrong way.
  2. Take a deep breath. Take a few.
  3. Observe, take note and be inspired.

———

I was shaking my head on the way home after a somewhat harrowing day. Why me? Why oh why do I have to be in the midst of these crazies? Okay, they’re not crazies, they are really challenging people who give me the crazies! These are people who rub me the wrong way and with whom my patience just dries up. They are usually demanding in some way, and always exhausting.

I couldn’t understand what role these people might possibly play in my life, other than being the cause of a premature coronary or some serious, stress-related health issue. Just as I was considering changing my identity and relocating, it dawned on me that perhaps there was a gift in here somewhere. Difficult people might be a gift? Right.

But you see, because of them we are actually able to clearly see what happens in the human psyche and within human relationships.

A difficult person has a dominating aspect(s) in their character. This colors everything they do and say, and clearly affects those they come in to contact with (for better or for worse.) The awakening is that these people have these magnified aspects of personality, which enables us to see, study and perhaps understand why they are the way they are and how they (dys)function in the world.

What a gift! What a way to study character, to contemplate psychological development and increase understanding of the human condition: all things helpful in creating characters, and understanding ourselves better. And of course the more we understand ourselves, the more we can offer ourselves in our acting work.

These people are walking psychological experiments all for the taking. They give us the opportunity to really see what happens in the human psyche and within human relationships. What other opportunity is there for studying someone so fascinating and so complex?

So invite them in, I say, and study away.
Besides which, this just might make them a teeny bit easier to deal with.

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